Speeding on Techno


E is not just a happy rave party drug. It’s also a letter, and a dangerous substance for ravers while driving. The perps portrayed in the picture to the right were caught speeding at 100MPH on Market St. while listening to Benni Benassi. When asked why they were pulled over, the driver responded, “In the name of love.” Officer Wang asked suspect Dick Leckman (Centered holding Elmo), to step out of the car, at which point Wang noticed that Leckman was overly friendly.

Elmo was not hurt this time Obama, but can we wait for a next time? Driving while listening techno is like drinking and driving, without the drinking, but the same likelihood of speeding because that FREAKIN’ bass is driving the car.